So what can I say. I had a revelation today at the race. I realized that things take longer when you get older. Like healing and getting in shape. I am not as fast and agile as I once was. I am not going to heal and bounce right back. Is this a problem? Sure if you think you should still be the athlete you were when you were younger. Let's face it though. I am 36 and I have abused my body in ways no one should. The fact that almost all the guys I ride with are either half my age or in there early 20's is reason enough to throw in the towel. Yes I get my ass handed to me when I go out with these guys. I admire the way their legs work effortlessly and never seem to wear down. I marvel at the fact that an injury to them can heal in half as much time. These guys are fast and strong. Sure it is discouraging at times and you feel like you don't belong or you are that donkey in a class of thoroughbreds. I am just happy that they allow me to ride with them.
I arrived at the race around 9 am to do my pre-ride laps and plan my race strategy. I was one of the first ones to practice. I felt like someone cut off my oxygen. The humidity in the woods was so intense I felt like I was drowning. I could not catch my breath to save my life. I have never had asthma, but I am pretty sure this was how it felt. I just kept pushing. My legs felt great but the lack of oxygen and the heart rate taching a little over 200 bpm, I was flipping out. I finished my first practice lap and went back to my car to get some relief. I settled down and went out for another pre-ride and felt pretty good. So good that I was having fun and I really wanted to just ride. I didn't want to ruin my mood by putting race pressure on me. I met up with my friend Steve and I decided what I needed today was just to relax and have a "fun" ride and watch Steve race. I love to watch others race. Especially Steve. I don't need to be in the spotlight and I actually find greater joy in others moments of glory than my own. Steve's parents were at the race also and other friends of his so what better way to enjoy a perfect day than to hang out with them and watch the race.
After the race was done I wanted to do some more riding. I went off on my own and just rode and did some thinking and occasionally caught myself smiling while no one was looking. I was thinking about how can I become a better racer and how can I enjoy my races more. It really was a simple answer.
I came to my senses on that ride today. I am never going to compete with these 20 years olds and I shouldn't have too. I should just feel blessed that I have the opportunity to ride with them and do my best to keep up. Another racer I know said to me that this is my rebuilding year. This is my year to concentrate on my knee and don;t worry about anything else. Next year will be my year. He is right. I know I have said it is not about the podium. It is not. I do find myself wanting things to be like they were two years ago but at my age, healing takes time.
I only have 4 more races left then my season is over. I am looking forward to spending time training this Winter and concentrating on my other body parts and fitness and not putting all my attention on my knee. I look forward to riding and racing next year and kicking some ass. The young guys keep me hungry and I also believe they make me a better rider and racer. It is not easy riding with them but I am thankful I can at my age. I look forward to concentrating more on downhill next year and using cross country racing as conditioning training. My love is downhill and I have a natural talent for it. I just need to realize that I am older and I can't bounce back like I used too.
It is a bitch getting old, but if you realize your limitations and your capabilities, I think you will be more successful at whatever it is you are doing. Getting old doesn't mean giving up.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Mullets, Pancakes and Sportsmanship
So it has been a couple of races since I last posted. This weekend it was the DINO race in Versailles, Indiana. I must say I was pretty pumped up for this one, yet I was extremely relaxed. I decided to follow a good training plan which mostly consisted of proper eating habits. I have always had horrible eating habits. I am not talking about eating junk, I am talking about eating period. Some days I only eat once a day which is not good for any situation.
Fast forward to Saturday night after a nice plate of pasta, I decided to spice things up for the race. I decided in honor of the Tour de France and World Cup Soccer, I would rock a Euro Mullet for Sundays race. Those of you who don't know what a Euro Mullet is, think of a sophisticated version of a "Redneck Mullet". My hair was getting long and I had not time to get to Bob, so I decided to shave the sides and sport a mullet for the race. Did not happen the way I wanted it though. I looked more like Lyle Lovitt than a sexy Euro soccer player or cyclist. Off with the rest. Yes, shaved the rest off.
Sunday morning I woke up at 5am to get ready. I really didn't want to eat but I managed to force down three pancakes with no syrup and a small coke for caffeine. Just like the Pro's. Arrived at the race venue and met Steve and Jess. We set up a pretty sweet spot under the new race shelter canopy I purchased so we can have a proper rally point. The humidity and sun were brutal. It was definitely going to be a scorcher.
Steve was up first. He started around 10 am for the Cat 2. Jess and I headed to the start line and various points on the course to watch and cheer him on. Steve killed it with a podium finish once again.
Two hours later my race started. I was in the starting group behind Jess. Which was her first real mountain bike race and I was so excited for her. She took off at the start and it was my wave start next.
I am not going to go into detail about my race. I will admit I crushed that course and could have done alot better than I did, but one thing put it all into perspective.
SPORTSMANSHIP
I have said before that it is not always about the podium and even though it does feel good to get that podium, some things are more important. About one and a half miles into my race I was chasing down one of my opponents. This is how I like to race. I like to start in the back and chase everyone down and pick them off one by one. I hate being chased, so this tactic makes me faster.
I have him in my sights as we are racing on the edge of steep cliffs and waterfalls and then he disappears. I figured he took off and I lost sight. Coming around a bend I see he has went off the side and down the steep hillside about 20 feet. I would estimate the total steep hillside was about 50 to 60 feet.
At this point any decent human being would stop and help. I asked if he was ok and needed help. The guy could not get up the hillside it was so steep. I got off my bike and went down part of the hillside and we did a daisy chain. I grabbed the front wheel of his bike while he hung onto the rear wheel and I pulled while he climbed. We were able to get on the trail again. Made sure he was ok and I told him to go ahead, he had position advantage over me. I felt it was only fair. I didn't want to place over a rider because of a crash. I wanted to beat him straight up.
The racer starts off and I give him some space so I can chase and not more than 50 yards he goes over the side of the trail again. I stopped, we executed the same recovery procedure and then he was on the trail again. This time he gave me advantage and let me go.
Unfortunately, not many racers stopped or asked if things were ok. This angered me. I have seen this all too often racing. Sure it is perfectly legal to keep going after a racer wrecks, but at what point is a little medal or award worth more than the safety of another human being. I think how a racer conducts his or herself on the course speaks volumes. At least 99% of the racers are local and regional racers. Only a select few are gifted and trained to be serious racers with a greater goal. I could not be satisfied winning if I knew I won at the cost of someone else's health and safety.
I was hammering it the rest of the way and about a mile left I came up on my friend Jess. She was doing great and taking a breather. I passed and she followed but had a mishap and went down. I stopped to make sure she was ok and was not hurt. This was her first real race and I was not about to leave her after a crash. She got up, composed herself and brushed it off. We were off to the finish.
In all, I was the leader at one point but I didn't care that I lost position. The races are about fun and a common love of the sport and helping others. I would not have felt good about myself if I got first because I took advantage of a crash or ignored a fellow racer who was down.
I came in second as I sprinted like hell to the finish line to get the best time I could. I felt accomplished. i felt like things are starting to finally come together and my training and conditioning are starting to improve. I feel like I am finally coming out of rehab and recovery phase to actually improving to become a true competitor. I finally made a podium finish and now I have to do a mandatory category upgrade according to the rules. This means more mileage, more training and better competitors. Bring it. I never back down from a challenge. Next race, my nemesis, Harbin Park. I will shave my head, eat my pancakes and just race my race.
Fast forward to Saturday night after a nice plate of pasta, I decided to spice things up for the race. I decided in honor of the Tour de France and World Cup Soccer, I would rock a Euro Mullet for Sundays race. Those of you who don't know what a Euro Mullet is, think of a sophisticated version of a "Redneck Mullet". My hair was getting long and I had not time to get to Bob, so I decided to shave the sides and sport a mullet for the race. Did not happen the way I wanted it though. I looked more like Lyle Lovitt than a sexy Euro soccer player or cyclist. Off with the rest. Yes, shaved the rest off.
Sunday morning I woke up at 5am to get ready. I really didn't want to eat but I managed to force down three pancakes with no syrup and a small coke for caffeine. Just like the Pro's. Arrived at the race venue and met Steve and Jess. We set up a pretty sweet spot under the new race shelter canopy I purchased so we can have a proper rally point. The humidity and sun were brutal. It was definitely going to be a scorcher.
Steve was up first. He started around 10 am for the Cat 2. Jess and I headed to the start line and various points on the course to watch and cheer him on. Steve killed it with a podium finish once again.
Two hours later my race started. I was in the starting group behind Jess. Which was her first real mountain bike race and I was so excited for her. She took off at the start and it was my wave start next.
I am not going to go into detail about my race. I will admit I crushed that course and could have done alot better than I did, but one thing put it all into perspective.
SPORTSMANSHIP
I have said before that it is not always about the podium and even though it does feel good to get that podium, some things are more important. About one and a half miles into my race I was chasing down one of my opponents. This is how I like to race. I like to start in the back and chase everyone down and pick them off one by one. I hate being chased, so this tactic makes me faster.
I have him in my sights as we are racing on the edge of steep cliffs and waterfalls and then he disappears. I figured he took off and I lost sight. Coming around a bend I see he has went off the side and down the steep hillside about 20 feet. I would estimate the total steep hillside was about 50 to 60 feet.
At this point any decent human being would stop and help. I asked if he was ok and needed help. The guy could not get up the hillside it was so steep. I got off my bike and went down part of the hillside and we did a daisy chain. I grabbed the front wheel of his bike while he hung onto the rear wheel and I pulled while he climbed. We were able to get on the trail again. Made sure he was ok and I told him to go ahead, he had position advantage over me. I felt it was only fair. I didn't want to place over a rider because of a crash. I wanted to beat him straight up.
The racer starts off and I give him some space so I can chase and not more than 50 yards he goes over the side of the trail again. I stopped, we executed the same recovery procedure and then he was on the trail again. This time he gave me advantage and let me go.
Unfortunately, not many racers stopped or asked if things were ok. This angered me. I have seen this all too often racing. Sure it is perfectly legal to keep going after a racer wrecks, but at what point is a little medal or award worth more than the safety of another human being. I think how a racer conducts his or herself on the course speaks volumes. At least 99% of the racers are local and regional racers. Only a select few are gifted and trained to be serious racers with a greater goal. I could not be satisfied winning if I knew I won at the cost of someone else's health and safety.
I was hammering it the rest of the way and about a mile left I came up on my friend Jess. She was doing great and taking a breather. I passed and she followed but had a mishap and went down. I stopped to make sure she was ok and was not hurt. This was her first real race and I was not about to leave her after a crash. She got up, composed herself and brushed it off. We were off to the finish.
In all, I was the leader at one point but I didn't care that I lost position. The races are about fun and a common love of the sport and helping others. I would not have felt good about myself if I got first because I took advantage of a crash or ignored a fellow racer who was down.
I came in second as I sprinted like hell to the finish line to get the best time I could. I felt accomplished. i felt like things are starting to finally come together and my training and conditioning are starting to improve. I feel like I am finally coming out of rehab and recovery phase to actually improving to become a true competitor. I finally made a podium finish and now I have to do a mandatory category upgrade according to the rules. This means more mileage, more training and better competitors. Bring it. I never back down from a challenge. Next race, my nemesis, Harbin Park. I will shave my head, eat my pancakes and just race my race.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Sometimes it is not about the podium.....
I find that just because you do not place in a race or event, that does not mean you did not win the race. I headed out to Muscatatuck with my friend Steve, who by the way is a very talented mountain bike racer, to do my race and watch him and enjoy the festivities. I will admit on the way there I was getting nervous. Nervous to the point I was shaking in the car when we were about 5 miles away. Nervousness and intense adrenaline rushes are something that I have always battled. Anxiety ridden if I may say so. This is great for quick, intense downhill races but we are talking a 45 to 60 minute cross country race.
We parked and unloaded the car and bikes and did my usual routine. Pre-rode the course and then watched Steve and his race. My race was coming up and I still was not 100% on racing due to my knee. With 11 minutes until race time I entered.
I tried to calm my nerves at the start line. I was sizing up the competition. They called us to the line and the horn went off. I started in the middle of the pack. I saw 5 guys take off fast and I knew if i didn't want to get caught in the bottle neck traffic upon entering the woods I would have to make a move. I hit the shifters, kicked in the higher gears and smashed the pedals. I hit an outside line in a grassy part and blew past most until I was in 3rd at the entrance of the woods. Once in the woods, I was chasing down two racers who were definitely not beginners. I was wheel sucking them the whole time due to the fast descents in the first part of the course. I knew if I passed them they would just crush me on the climbing. Let's face it, I am a downhiller and not an uphiller. I decided to stay with them to conserve energy.
I lost my ability to climb with some pretty nasty injuries the past two years. Not to mention some unwanted extra baggage due to simpathy donuts this past winter. Most know I injured my knee pretty bad this winter and I am still on the mend and have a ways to go to get back to normal.
The first of the climbs came. I knew this is where I would lose time and position. The two racers in front started to break away. I heard some other racers creeping up behind. Two more racers passed me on the climbs. I started to get that feeling of defeat and the voice of doubt and disappointment were talking to me. I was only about a mile and a half into the race and I was ready to pull out at a break in the woods when I couldn't because of a photographer standing right in the way. I think this was a sign. The photographer was there for a reason. Not to take my picture but to basically tell me to suck it up and don't be a "pussy". I passed him and started another climb and knew this might be torture.
The race went on with me blowing by racers on the descents and then them passing me on the climbs. I knew this was going to be the outline of the race. I started to pass up some CAT 3 women who started the race ahead of ours and saw how they were struggling but still kept going. At one point a racer who passed me on a steep climb recovered on the flat and out of nowhere flipped over the bars. I stopped to make sure he was ok. He was hurting pretty bad. He started to recover and insisted I continue, all the while other racers are passing me. I got back on my bike and hit the pedals. Luckily at this point there were many technical parts and descents and a paved portion that allowed me to pass up racers and make up time.
AWAKENING
I am a big believer that things happen for a reason. I found myself juggling positions in the middle of the race with a four other racers. Instead of a race, it turned into five people having fun and enjoying the same level of suffering I was. I realized that this was not a race for me anymore. I lost sight of why I was doing this race. I was trying to beat everyone. The reality is I could not. I have suffered a severe injury five months prior and happy that I can even race let alone ride a bike according to one Orthopedics predictions.
A moment of clarity hit me and I realized that my goal is just to finish. This would be a great reward for all my hard work to get my knee back and prove the doctors wrong.
I settled down and continued to ride in a group for almost the rest of the race. We were talking to each other, helping each other, laughing, grunting, sweating, sometimes feeling like death. We all had fun. I even had a push from another racer on a very steep climb. He pulled off because he gassed out and as I was passing him on the climb and slowing down, he gave me a push on my back to give me that extra kick. This isn't really accepted in racing and illegal, but who cares, we were there to have fun. I couldn't help but notice even through the torture of the climbs, I had a smile on my face. Each one I conquered was a milestone in proof that all my training I have been doing something right.
We came to the end of the race. A few pulled away on the last climbs. I came out of the woods to the finish line and as I crossed a huge sense of accomplishment and joy hit me. I didn't care about what place i came in or if i was not the fastest rider. I was not going to podium or place in this race. You would say I did not win. Truth is I did win. I won the race. It was my race to be won. I won it. No medal or podium or picture or prize could replace that feeling I had at the finish line. I finished the race and my knee and my body did what I had doubts it could do.
My point is, it is not always about the podium. Race your race. There is always going to be someone out there who is faster, stronger and smarter. Accept this fact and a whole new world will open up. Life should be enjoyed and you should have fun and find that brotherhood or sisterhood like I found during the race. My opponent was adversity and my will to prove to myself that I can do this again. I did.
When I am asked if I won my race this weekend, I tell with a big smile, "Hell Yeah I Did!"
We parked and unloaded the car and bikes and did my usual routine. Pre-rode the course and then watched Steve and his race. My race was coming up and I still was not 100% on racing due to my knee. With 11 minutes until race time I entered.
I tried to calm my nerves at the start line. I was sizing up the competition. They called us to the line and the horn went off. I started in the middle of the pack. I saw 5 guys take off fast and I knew if i didn't want to get caught in the bottle neck traffic upon entering the woods I would have to make a move. I hit the shifters, kicked in the higher gears and smashed the pedals. I hit an outside line in a grassy part and blew past most until I was in 3rd at the entrance of the woods. Once in the woods, I was chasing down two racers who were definitely not beginners. I was wheel sucking them the whole time due to the fast descents in the first part of the course. I knew if I passed them they would just crush me on the climbing. Let's face it, I am a downhiller and not an uphiller. I decided to stay with them to conserve energy.
I lost my ability to climb with some pretty nasty injuries the past two years. Not to mention some unwanted extra baggage due to simpathy donuts this past winter. Most know I injured my knee pretty bad this winter and I am still on the mend and have a ways to go to get back to normal.
The first of the climbs came. I knew this is where I would lose time and position. The two racers in front started to break away. I heard some other racers creeping up behind. Two more racers passed me on the climbs. I started to get that feeling of defeat and the voice of doubt and disappointment were talking to me. I was only about a mile and a half into the race and I was ready to pull out at a break in the woods when I couldn't because of a photographer standing right in the way. I think this was a sign. The photographer was there for a reason. Not to take my picture but to basically tell me to suck it up and don't be a "pussy". I passed him and started another climb and knew this might be torture.
The race went on with me blowing by racers on the descents and then them passing me on the climbs. I knew this was going to be the outline of the race. I started to pass up some CAT 3 women who started the race ahead of ours and saw how they were struggling but still kept going. At one point a racer who passed me on a steep climb recovered on the flat and out of nowhere flipped over the bars. I stopped to make sure he was ok. He was hurting pretty bad. He started to recover and insisted I continue, all the while other racers are passing me. I got back on my bike and hit the pedals. Luckily at this point there were many technical parts and descents and a paved portion that allowed me to pass up racers and make up time.
AWAKENING
I am a big believer that things happen for a reason. I found myself juggling positions in the middle of the race with a four other racers. Instead of a race, it turned into five people having fun and enjoying the same level of suffering I was. I realized that this was not a race for me anymore. I lost sight of why I was doing this race. I was trying to beat everyone. The reality is I could not. I have suffered a severe injury five months prior and happy that I can even race let alone ride a bike according to one Orthopedics predictions.
A moment of clarity hit me and I realized that my goal is just to finish. This would be a great reward for all my hard work to get my knee back and prove the doctors wrong.
I settled down and continued to ride in a group for almost the rest of the race. We were talking to each other, helping each other, laughing, grunting, sweating, sometimes feeling like death. We all had fun. I even had a push from another racer on a very steep climb. He pulled off because he gassed out and as I was passing him on the climb and slowing down, he gave me a push on my back to give me that extra kick. This isn't really accepted in racing and illegal, but who cares, we were there to have fun. I couldn't help but notice even through the torture of the climbs, I had a smile on my face. Each one I conquered was a milestone in proof that all my training I have been doing something right.
We came to the end of the race. A few pulled away on the last climbs. I came out of the woods to the finish line and as I crossed a huge sense of accomplishment and joy hit me. I didn't care about what place i came in or if i was not the fastest rider. I was not going to podium or place in this race. You would say I did not win. Truth is I did win. I won the race. It was my race to be won. I won it. No medal or podium or picture or prize could replace that feeling I had at the finish line. I finished the race and my knee and my body did what I had doubts it could do.
My point is, it is not always about the podium. Race your race. There is always going to be someone out there who is faster, stronger and smarter. Accept this fact and a whole new world will open up. Life should be enjoyed and you should have fun and find that brotherhood or sisterhood like I found during the race. My opponent was adversity and my will to prove to myself that I can do this again. I did.
When I am asked if I won my race this weekend, I tell with a big smile, "Hell Yeah I Did!"
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